Nursing Voices

Friday, April 27, 2007

A Health Tip For Men

Gentlemen, I want to share this with you because the information it contains may one day save your life. I received it in an email from my mother the other day, and I think every man should carry a copy of these instructions with him at all times. By following these directions you will survive “that time of the month.”

Buy a bottle of wine and enjoy your weekend.


Blogger Cliffie said...

Hey Mom, I was disappointed when I thought you had killed this one. How many patients land in the psych ward because they are living with a person of the other sex who might as well be speaking Klingon?

8:46 AM  
Blogger poody said...

this is a must have for all hetrosexual men

12:19 PM  
Blogger ~Autumn said...

Step 1: copy instructions to Word
Step 2: Push Print
Step 3: Tape to husband's forehead.

Thanks MJ!

7:04 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

So when a guy gets sick, like once in a zillion years, you women berate males as being weak, babyish and generally "unable to handle adversity!!!" And yet whenever you get your period; males are to bow to your inner hormone and pander to your every demon.
So why the dichotomy? Seems to me that the pussification of American males, by feminazis is alive and well.


12:58 AM  
Blogger alphabet soup said...

'Have some more wine' - the panacea for all ills. I love that idea.
On a more serious note Mother Jones, I would like to link your previous post to my Soup du Jour.
Ms Soup

5:28 AM  
Blogger Mother Jones RN said...

Alphabet Soup: Thank you for linking my post to your blog.

Steve: I can’t explain the hormone dichotomy that you have so aptly pointed out. It’s just one of the world’s mysteries that no one has been able to explain.


5:56 AM  
Blogger Bohemian Road Nurse... said...

That's the funniest thing I've ever seen! Wish I'd had it for my ex-husbands!

Would somebody please give Anonymous (Steve) that card? But first, add the following lines, just for him:

Dangerous: Saying men only get sick "once in a zillion years";

Safer: I am weak, babyish and unable to handle adversity;

Safest: Please allow me to to bow to your inner hormone and pander to your every demon;

Ultra-Safe: I am a pussy....

9:22 AM  
Blogger Jean-Luc Picard said...

How well would it be to say "I don't like wine."

10:00 AM  
Blogger may said...

my husband will feel so defeated. because i don't drink wine :(

7:14 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

No Bohemian Road Nurse; not a pussy. Just a tired old motorcycle riding farm boy that is fed up with gender bashing.


12:24 AM  
Blogger Bohemian Road Nurse... said...

To Steve:

It's just a joke---so don't take it so seriously. Even motorcycle dudes joke about women in that "gender-bashing" way. I used to be married to a biker and we ladies learned to take the gender bashing jokes in stride. (My ex used to have a t-shirt that said: "If you can see this, the bitch fell off....") (I didn't mind that one, but the one that said: "If I throw a stick will you run away" DID bug me somewhat....)

1:48 AM  
Blogger The Angry Medic said...

Bohemian: Ouch, Bohemian, ouch! And "If you can see this, the bitch fell off...."?!

You are HEE-larious sometimes, you know :)

Momma Jones: Why didn't you enter my life earlier? This would've saved my life so many times :)

10:31 AM  
Blogger Smalltown RN said...

I am giving this one to my hubby.....

12:49 PM  
Blogger AzRN said...

Jean-Luc & May-

I think it would be safe (and permissible) to substitute any one of the following for wine: chocolate, buying new or more clothes, or "sure honey, we can sit here and talk."

Would you agree Mama Jones?

4:36 PM  
Blogger Mother Jones RN said...

AzRN: Agreed. I'd also like to add "Yes, dear. Whatever you say, dear" to the list.

Angry Medic: I wish I had met you sooner, too. We can thank Kim at emergiblog for getting us together. She's the one who talked me into starting my blog:-)


1:24 AM  
Blogger scalpel said...

I thought it was funny.

10:59 AM  
Blogger Shrinked Immaculate said...

Echo Angry Medic's words. I needed that much earlier. now its too late. Wistful sigh.

7:31 AM  
Blogger The Curmudgeon said...

"Whatever you say, dear" is fraught with its own perils -- if the tone and inflection aren't just right there can be seriuos repurcussions.

Stick to wine. Or the potable of your spouse's choice.

12:30 PM  
Blogger MadMike said...

Marvelous! I am going to steal this MJ. I hope you don't mind:-) It is just too good to pass up.....

Wine anyone?

3:44 PM  
Blogger Forgotten Blue Line said...

When I was younger I lived my mother and two sisters. Their biological clocks did merge so I was in danger 3 weeks a month more if they were milking it. I just fed them salty snacks. It made them thirsty, but I rather them be mad about there being nothing to drink then at me.

Also don't get me started about the weird looks I got at the store buying boxes and boxes of pads and tampons with chips.

11:08 PM  

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